Inclination for Sleep

I feel I should forewarn my readers...this post in not in the pattern of my others. You will not learn anything about my school life, but about me. Don't worry, I am not about to start sharing my feelings or walk you through a day (although that would seem to fit with the rest of my blog). My blog is not becoming any more personal, but I must write on this.

Sleep has always been a large part of my life. I suppose it is for all babies and toddlers, but I think it is telling that my first clear memory is waking up from my nap at pre-school. I was never one to fuss about taking naps, I might have wanted to continue doing what I was doing, but once lying down, I never complained. (My mother may say otherwise...but this is how I remember it.)

When I was older, and nap was no longer a subject in school, I would nap on the weekends. I can't remember if I took naps on Saturdays, but I can assure you, every Sunday after church I took a nap. At first, I am sure that I took a nap because I needed one, as all small children do. But then, it became a special time for me to spend with my mother. I got to sleep on my dad's side of the bed and cuddle and play with my mom's hair until I feel asleep. I am sure that many times my mother would have liked me to nap in my own room, as I would often prattle on for a while until sleep hit me, but I don't think I ever did nap in my own room. My mom was my nap partner.

This may be more significant than it seems. I am sure not all mother's nap with their children, it is often thought of as quiet time for the parents, but my mom and I always napped together. I suppose my love for naps must have been handed down from her. She is an elementary school teacher and so was always tired as her work was so trying (I think though, she too loves to nap just for the sake of it as I do now).

When I was a little older, probably about fourth to eighth grade, napping became uncool. I am sure I could have used one, but I was a big girl and was given the choice of napping or not. I often flat out choose to not nap, but some days I did choose to nap. I remember nothing was different about those days, I was not more tired, or had less pressing activities, but I wanted to cuddle with my mom. So I would get into my spot, and start pretending to nap. Most times, I couldn't fall asleep and so left after my mom fell asleep to play in my room. I should be clear here, I had other opportunities to spend time with my mom and to cuddle with her, but Sunday afternoons were embedded in my mine as the time to do it.

Later in high school, I became ill and so napping was back in. I would nap after school, sleep in, and go to bed early. I was giving my body the chance to heal. The thing is, I have not recovered from this illness, but it brought napping back into my life. I was more tired than I had been for years and so needed the nap, but I also had desires to nap. Nap time became a time to not do anything. It was at least an hour set aside from my day to not think about school and the work I had to do. I still napped with mother, but something had changed. I did not wake her up as I used to, she woke me up (actually she turned the alarm off and let me sleep as long as I needed to).

My life was not so demanding that I needed to have an excuse to take a break from it, but napping became that, and has stayed that. It draws me in, the warmth of the blankets, the quiet of the room, the free time. I now nap more than most. I often times wake up on the weekend, eat breakfast, and then take a nap. (I am told by my friends that this does not count as a nap, but as going back to bed...it's a nap.) Napping has become ingrained in me. I am often grumpy when I don't get a nap and my naps last longer and longer. I attribute this to the fact that I am just so tired with all my school work, but I must also say I love to nap.